Home is Ground Zero: Where Signs of Firefighters Struggling First Appear

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By Steve Farina, Executive Vice-President of British Columbia Professional Fire Fighters’ Association

Where do the first signs and symptoms show up when a first responder is struggling? From my experience over the last 30 years as a firefighter, I know it’s at home, with our partners, kids, other family, and support people. This is why we often call home “Ground Zero.”

We often focus on the impact of tending to traumatic incidents, and organizational challenges, such as staffing issues, low morale, and other work-related issues. Although these are contributing factors and a large piece of the puzzle, often it’s the homefront that suffers first. Or it can be the proverbial “straw that broke the camel’s back.”

When things get rocky in a relationship due to a myriad of reasons (marital issues, childcare challenges, eldercare, finances, intimacy, etc.) it can impact your ability to navigate life and work.

Home may be Ground Zero, but it’s also the first line of defense in remaining resilient, and it can provide much-needed support during difficult times. When relationships and communication break down, it may be the first domino to fall, and the next one is how you show up as a first responder.

Mental Health Built on Layers

I often refer to a person’s mental health and lived experience as layers of an onion. It starts in childhood, and each experience adds a layer. Some layers are thicker than others based on whether it had a positive or negative impact.

We have run more than 40 BC Fire Fighter Resiliency Programs with more than 300 participants, and learned a shocking number of participants had endured some form of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs). This observation was also noted during the BC Police Resiliency Program, which has had more than 100 participants to date.

We discovered ACEs frequently inspired individuals to become first responders, including firefighters and police officers. They were driven by a desire to shield society from the trauma they experienced or saw happening to others.

The shame associated with these experiences had often been suppressed for decades. We found there’s amazing healing in group work, like the BC Fire Fighter Resiliency Program. It’s a safe setting with peers who have shared and lived experiences. It’s a place to be seen and heard, to be vulnerable without judgment, and where you can finally unburden yourself from the emotional pain and weight you have carried for so many years.

Education and Awareness Provides Hope

I believe we’re the total sum of all of our experiences (life and work). Each experience is added to our backpack that can get heavier and heavier as life and our careers move along. Even a difficult probation can feel like an adverse experience and can add to our backpack, setting us up for a challenging career.

Combine all of this with responding to potentially traumatic incidents, organizational stress, and the everyday stresses of life, and you may have an emotional powder keg on your hands! I realize I’m painting a bleak picture here, but there is HOPE! The fire service is changing, and it starts with education and awareness.

Back to Ground Zero. From my own experience, I was unaware of what I had already loaded in my backpack before starting out as a first responder. As my career advanced, I became aware there’s a cost to serving on the frontline, to my physical and mental health. There’s an impact on your soul, your perspective on life, and on how you view society.

Without the guidance of a mental health professional, supportive family, peers, and a psychologically safe workplace, your mental health is at risk and the chance of mental ill health increases with time.

I have learned that if you transmit your trauma to the ones you love, your friends, and/or co-workers, and do not transform, heal and grow from those experiences, that powder keg you’ve been loading up along the way may go off unexpectedly.

It can be a slow burn or an explosion, often precipitated by a growing loss of patience, building anger or loss of compassion and empathy. It can show up at home and work as hypervigilance or a complete lack of joy and caring.

Put Down the Backpack

What I’ve heard from a multitude of spouses over the last eight years is that their partner has changed, they’re not the same person anymore. They’ve become disconnected from their family and friends, and are having an increasingly difficult time navigating the roller-coaster of life.

Over time, and without intentionally unpacking and processing the backpack along the way, our window of tolerance narrows, and our performance is affected.

Sadly, many first responders wait far too long before reaching out or recognizing they’re spiraling or overloaded. They wait until they’re burned out, have compassion fatigue, or worse. They wait until they’re at the edge of the waterfall, or they have already gone over and are now stuck in the rapids, or what we refer to as the “orange” or “red” zone of the mental-health continuum.

As a fire service, many organizations are realizing the importance of upstream education, awareness and early interventions for care, and that a firefighter is a whole person who has many layers that are intertwined with the core of their being.

They’re spouses, mothers, fathers, brothers and sisters, as well as first responders. They’re friends, coaches, and community volunteers, and they have the burden and stress all of society deals with daily, however, they have the additional responsibility and impact of service. As I mentioned, there’s a cost of service, and it’s often a heavy price.

What can we do about this? It starts with getting everyone on the same page. Spouses and partners need to be educated about the impact of service and how it may affect the relationship and home. Kids need age-appropriate resources to help them also understand, and first responders need to realize how they show up at home has a significant impact. Home may be Ground Zero, but it can also be a refuge of love and support.

For resources for individuals, couples and families, check out: