RELATIONSHIPSPartnerMaintaining Marital Bliss

Maintaining Marital Bliss

By: Geralyn St Joseph  Intuitive Relationship Empowerment Coach 

Marriage can be difficult, primarily when one or both partners work high-stress jobs with long shifts. It can be challenging to meet with your schedules. Add children to the mix, and nurturing your relationship may seem impossible. But, as my mom says, where there is a will, there is a way.

It’s easy to rely on your partner, allowing time to slip by, assuming that everything is good simply because it doesn’t seem bad. This can lead to the slow atrophy of your marriage. Resentment grows in neglected gardens. You need to make your primary relationship a priority. Your family and the stability of your emotional life depend on it. But how do we maintain our relationship with responsibilities pulling at our energy and attention?

First, it has to be a priority. Being a priority means considering your partner’s needs and wants when making decisions. Carving out time to express your love and commitment to one another is essential. Know your partner’s/your Love Language. Your love language is the way that you perceive love. This concept was first recognized by Dr Gary Chapman, who coined the phrase. 

Take the quiz on his website:

Act in alignment with your partner’s Love Language, and ask them to do the same. If their preferred mode of love expression is words, write little notes for your significant other to find throughout the day. Mail a love letter to express your feelings, and maybe talk about your hopes/dreams for your relationship. Let them know what they mean to you. Make time for one another and do your best to be there for important events. With the advent of streaming, this is easier than ever. FaceTime, Zoom, and FB Messenger can all provide a vehicle for your presence. Remind one another of why you chose each other. What made you fall in love? Recreate favorite moments. Create even more.

When you argue, fight fair. No personal attacks, name-calling, or grudges. An argument can be a means to become closer through understanding one another. Argue to understand as much as to be understood. If it becomes too heated, retreat to your corners to calm down. Reconvene only once you are both prepared to have a civil discussion. Being considerate and conscientious goes a long way towards feeding the flames of love. Be sure to maintain Intimacy, both emotional and physical. Men and women need this to remain close to their partners. Women often lose desire if their partner is neglectful of their other needs. Trust, support, and good communication are necessary to keep the attraction alive. Men also need to feel trusted, wanted, and needed by their partners.

Simply be present and pay attention to nurture your relationship.

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