Why Crisis Feels Like Home: The First Responder Paradox

Childhood adversity that instilled feelings of helplessness may also foster a strong desire to protect and help others

By Cinnamon S. Reiheld, LISW-S, LICDC, and Erin M. Maccabee, CDCA, ICF trained coach

First responders are often celebrated as heroes – individuals who step into the chaos, offering help and support when others cannot or will not. But what draws these individuals into such intense, self-sacrificing roles? 

For many, the answer lies in their past: the impact of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), and how they may shape identity and career choices. So, why do many individuals with childhood adversity gravitate toward first-responder professions? 

It’s a paradoxical pattern: the very childhood adversity that instilled feelings of helplessness may also foster a strong desire to protect and help others. For those who grew up feeling unsafe or unsupported, choosing a career where they’re in control – where they can step in and make a difference – can be an attempt to reclaim power and find purpose. 

It also could be about showing up in the world as the adult they needed growing up, or honoring the person who finally showed up when nobody else did.

For many of you, it’s not just a job, it’s personal.

And the truth is, a lot of first responders – maybe even you – carry a past loaded with adversity. The kind that sets you up to be a protector, but also leaves its mark.

If you ever felt like you were made for this work, like you’ve been dealing with crisis situations your whole life, there’s a reason for that. People with high ACE scores often develop a heightened awareness of stress and danger and, therefore, are unconsciously drawn to this work because it feels familiar. 

Kids who grow up in chaotic environments learn to spot danger early and figure out how to manage it – skills that translate well into first-responder roles. If you grew up protecting yourself or others, or feel at home in high-pressure situations, choosing a crisis-oriented career where you get to be the protector makes a lot of sense. Whether taking care of siblings or dealing with unpredictable parents, these skills became hardwired. 

For many first responders, those skills developed in childhood, like hyper-awareness and crisis management, are transformed into strengths they use daily. The chaos, the unpredictability, the adrenaline – it’s a space where you know how to operate. You’ve been managing these feelings and situations your whole life. It’s a way of, knowingly or unknowingly, turning pain into purpose. 

Understanding ACEs: The Stuff You Don’t Leave Behind

Often, first responders might not be fully aware of how their past experiences shape their professional choices. ACEs are the tough stuff that happen when you’re young, referring to experiences that can profoundly impact an individual’s development. These include neglect; physical, emotional, or sexual abuse; and household dysfunction, such as substance abuse, domestic violence, or parental separation. 

They follow you, shaping how you handle stress, how you relate to others, and even your career choice. The original ACE study by Kaiser Permanente and the CDC in the 1990s revealed a strong correlation between these childhood adversities and negative health outcomes later in life, including chronic disease, mental-health issues, and behavioral difficulties.

The good news is, understanding ACEs can be a powerful tool for healing. With trauma-informed care and targeted mental-health support, first responders can begin to address the root causes of their stress responses and develop healthier coping mechanisms. 

Early intervention, even in adulthood, is crucial. Trauma-informed care recognizes how early experiences shape behavior and uses that knowledge to help first responders build healthier patterns. By understanding how those experiences connect to present behavior, we can find ways to create new, healthier responses. 

The things we go through as kids shape how we see the world, and how we feel we should respond to people and events, even when unaware. Your perspective on situations and how to handle them is often the result of past experiences. These experiences develop cognitive patterns, ways of thinking, and reactions that carry into adulthood. You might not even realize how much your past is influencing your present. 

Look, if you’re thinking, “But that’s all in the past, shouldn’t people just get over it?” you’re not alone. A lot of first responders think the same way. But trauma doesn’t work like that. It’s like saying you can return a smoothed stone that tumbled in the ocean for 18 years to its original, coarse texture – it just doesn’t happen. The effects of childhood adversity don’t just vanish; they just evolve. 

Hypervigilance and Other Honed ‘Skills’

Those early survival skills don’t just disappear once you’re in a stable environment. One of the most common skills developed from childhood adversity is hypervigilance. 

Growing up in unpredictable or dangerous environments, many learn to be constantly alert. It’s an ability that serves first responders well on the job. Whether assessing danger, reading a situation, or reacting quickly, hypervigilance is a superpower in the field. There’s a cost, though.

It also negatively affects how we manage stress and read non-threatening situations. 

After repeated exposure to stressors, like violence or neglect early on, the limbic system, the brain’s emotional center managing our fear response, gets rewired. It becomes hyperactive, leading to heightened sensitivity to danger. 

This hyperawareness, which was adaptive in childhood, can become a double-edged sword in adulthood. That’s why so many first responders struggle to unwind. Their brains are stuck in “go mode,” even when there’s no emergency. It can make it challenging to distinguish between a bear attack (a real threat to your life) and coming home to a messy house, where you told your kids countless times to put their shoes and backpacks away (a perceived threat to your authority and order). 

When your brain gets wired to spot danger early on, it’s hard to switch that off, regardless of occupation.

But when it’s trained into you to be ready for the worst-case scenario or serves as an asset, or helps you excel in your career, it can become even more difficult to shut down. When shutting down becomes even more challenging, it often spills over on the most important ones we swore to protect. 

It can also manifest as irritability or anger, chronic anxiety, difficulty sleeping, trouble managing relationships, or feeling perpetually on edge, creating a continual need to take the edge “off.” It’s that sense of always waiting for the next crisis, even when things are calm. The same hyper-awareness that makes a great firefighter or paramedic becomes “the burden we used to be able to manage.” 

ACEs don’t just impact the mind; they also leave marks on the body. The stress of growing up in survival mode can lead to long-term health issues like heart disease, diabetes, and high blood pressure. The body adapts to running on overdrive, but that type of wear-and-tear increases over time.

Old patterns of coping, like substance use, reckless behavior, or shutting down emotionally, can also resurface under job stress. 

When you’ve been using certain tools to manage stress since childhood, they become habits. And when the job piles on more stress, those habits tend to show up, even when they’re not the healthiest choices. They’re the ones your brain and body know and are confident will bring you some relief. 

Changing the Rules: Normalizing Mental Health for First Responders

First-responder culture might not have always been the most open when it comes to discussing feelings, but change is happening now. Peer-support programs and open conversations are ending archaic practices and creating spaces where you can connect and support one another. It’s changing the mindset from “I’ve got this on my own” to “We’ve got each other’s backs.” 

Departments and organizations also recognize that mental healthcare isn’t just a luxury or a box to check, it’s crucial for keeping you all strong and ready for the next call, physically, mentally, and emotionally. 

The narrative is changing, folks. Asking for help is a smart, proactive move. You no longer have to wait until things are falling apart to seek support. Confronting childhood trauma isn’t easy, especially in a culture where vulnerability is often mislabeled as weakness. We see it as the most courageous form of truth-telling we can ask of those who have repeatedly proven their bravery. 

It’s about understanding how your experiences shaped your perspective and finding better, healthier ways to work through them.

It’s badass to tell your story, knowing people could use it against you and do it anyway because you recognize your healing is more important than what people think of you. 

It’s not a weakness; it’s smart and strengthens you in the long run. And it’s not just for the individual, it’s for the whole team. The stronger each person is, the stronger the whole department becomes. It shows you’re committed to being the best version of yourself for your team, family, and community.

Resilience That Sticks: Simple Moves for a Meaningful Change

We can’t change what happened, but we can change how we think about it and react to situations that remind us of it (consciously or not). It’s about turning those survival skills we honed in childhood into thriving strengths. We want you to connect the dots so you can understand why you react the way you do and develop new, healthier coping mechanisms.

The solutions don’t have to be complicated. Tools like mindfulness, meditation, simple breathwork, and increased emotional regulation help retrain the brain, ease the autopilot stress responses, and help you shift to something that works for you rather than against you.

It’s not about becoming a different person; it’s about learning how to turn off the switch when you don’t need it, so you can enjoy the good stuff, like family dinners, time with friends, and quiet moments between calls. 

Again, the work isn’t about undoing what happened, because you can’t. However, you can change how you allow it to affect you today. You build resilience by focusing on the here and now.

The Path Forward

Understanding how childhood adversity shapes first responders can lead to better support, stronger departments, and healthier individuals. Acknowledging it as the unseen foundation that led you to this career and pushed you towards the role of the protector can be a great strength. 

The same experiences that pushed you toward this career can also become your greatest asset when you address them with intention and support. We’re ensuring the people who show up for everyone else have someone showing up for them, too. 

By recognizing the impact of ACEs, providing resources, promoting trauma-informed care, and creating a culture of openness, we’re not just helping individuals; we’re strengthening the entire team. It’s not about shame or blame, it’s about understanding. 

When you can transform your experiences into strength, the results are a healthier and more balanced life. That’s how we build resilience, one call at a time, one shift at a time, one life at a time, keeping the foundation strong for those of you who protect us all.